Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Wrestler

Ladies, this next entry is dedicated to the devoted wing women we have in our lives...and for all the sh*thead friends they have to suffer through so that we may get to know their “friend” – for that night at least.


Below is a recap I had with said sh*thead friend a few saturdays back:


W: So can I ask you something?

Me: Whatsup?

W: So like, do you wrestle??

Me: WHAT?? Haha (hmm attempted humor?? Not sure yet…)

W: Seriously, like do you wrestle?? Because you look like you could really throw down and just be like so focused and...yea, throw down!

Me: (Ok, I think he may be trying to banter…I’ll play along) Umm...no I don't wrestle, but I’ve been known to kick box and I could kick YOUR ass in a heartbeat.

W: Oh yea!!! I know you could….I mean, so seriously do wrestle? (Beginning to jump up in down in seat and visibly get excited)

Me: Do you?? (W T F*CK!?! This must be his witty way of telling me he wants to get it on…no thank you. No thank you if you were the last man standing, no thank you.)

W: Yes I do. I mean, I haven't YET because I've been waiting for a worthy opponent…and I think I just found one…

Me: (Visuals of him jumping on the table and ripping his shit Hulk style flood my mind and my looks of horror must have precipitated his next response…)

W: Ohh my god...did I just make it awkward!??!! (Begins to punch himself in the face) Oh my god, I didn't mean to make it awkward...I really meant it as a compliment...like you just look strong…and like if you wrestled you could really throw down.

Me: (Poking bar companions and jets the bar – 2 minutes FLAT).


The next morning I heard a bit of feedback from my friend from the sh*thead:
"I think your friend might think I’m weird…”

The takeaway ladies is this: as wing women, sometimes we just have to throw down.

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